this too

It’s not sabotage. Those moments when you finally choose to deepen your healing, booking the healing session, or the meditation class and you instantly feel the relief, the knowing that something is going to help. You notice your energy move, in obvious ways, and in a direction of habit perhaps, you get sick. Perhaps the body screams out at you a manifestation of the mind, “but not yet, who will I be without this story”. I know a lot of us look at this experience as sabotage, but rather, turn to this change in your being, grasp it in your tender hands and hold it. Ask it, “what is it that you need?”. Let the heart answer, let the answer be the truth, let the answer be the piece you need to witness and hold and nurture before this next big step. It’s not sabotage, it’s your next piece to heal. Let that be ok.